A marriage rooted in faith

Barnett reflects on 11 years with his wife Brenda

Marriage is often painted as a picture-perfect union filled with endless joy, but the reality is far more complex. It is not always sunshine and rainbows. It takes faith, discipline, and hard work to build a marriage that lasts. Loving your spouse means putting them before yourself, learning to navigate life’s challenges together, and continuously growing both as individuals and as a couple.

Brenda and I have been married for 11 years, and our journey has been one of love, trials, and ultimately, faith. From the very start, our relationship moved fast. When we met, she already had a son, Solomon, and within our first year together, we found out we were expecting our own child, JC IV.

Life was moving quickly, and four months after JC was born, we got married. As the years went on, we added Jovi and Ava to our growing family, making our household full of life, laughter, and at times, chaos.

Marriage on its own is challenging, but adding children to the mix takes it to another level. Parenting is a beautiful responsibility, but it requires constant selflessness, patience, and teamwork. There were moments when life felt overwhelming—when stress, personal struggles, and responsibilities threatened to pull us apart. Some trials, if we had let them, could have caused serious damage to our relationship.

But through it all, we held on, even when holding on was hard.

One of the most important lessons we have learned is that our marriage is about more than just us. It is not just about being husband and wife but about recognizing our true identity as children of God. Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.” This verse has become a guiding principle for me.

Love in marriage is not just about emotions; it is about sacrifice, grace, and commitment. It is an action. When we place God at the center, we love each other not just as spouses but as fellow believers, as partners in faith, and as a team striving toward something greater than ourselves.

Today, Brenda and I look toward the future with hope. We understand that a strong marriage is not built overnight. It is something we choose every single day. We choose forgiveness over resentment, faith over fear, and love over selfishness.

Our story is not perfect, but it is real. It is a testament to God’s grace, to perseverance, and to the beauty of a love that is willing to grow, change, and endure. Through every trial, we have learned that marriage is not about perfection. It is about commitment, faith, and the willingness to walk hand in hand, no matter what comes our way.