Renewing love

Serve, share, find common joys when the initial infatuation fades

When newness wears off, it can feel unsettling. Whether it’s a relationship, job, or possession, we often fear the day when the initial excitement fades. It’s a natural part of life that there will be moments of plateau—times when the shine wears off, and we must make an intentional effort to continue loving, appreciating, or committing to something.

In relationships, this transition is inevitable. Popular culture often portrays love as a feeling, but in reality, love is an action. It’s not constant emotional bliss or endless butterflies. There will be days when feelings fluctuate, and it becomes hard work to stay connected. True love is shown through how we continue to invest in those we care about.

Brenda, my wife and I, are still in love as we enter our 12th year of marriage. But staying in love has taken intentional effort. We’ve had to find fresh ways to love each other, which hasn’t always been easy. One way we’ve done this is by sharing scripture we’ve read during our personal devotional time. This practice not only strengthens our individual relationships with God but also deepens our connection as a couple. It has become a common interest that fuels our love and helps us continue to grow together.

What is that common interest between you and your spouse? Finding those shared passions can breathe new life into your relationship.

Similarly, we show love to our children through care and consistency – feeding, clothing and spending time with them, even when were tired or frustrated. These daily acts of service demonstrate love far more than words ever could.

The same principle applies to our jobs or other commitments. That dream job we were excited about can become a burden, and staying productive may require renewed effort. Finding deeper purpose, often rooted in service to others, can reignite passion for the work we do.

When the newness wears off, it’s not a sign of failure but an opportunity to let love and service take center stage. By acting with intention—serving, sharing, and finding shared joys—we can rediscover the beauty in our relationships and commitments, bringing newness back into our lives.